Friday, July 2, 2010

My Vipassana Experience



Note - I wrote this memoir of my experience at Vipassana for the same reason one would write about a trip/movie/song that they enjoyed - to recommend it for others to do so if they wish.

They say a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step, in the case of Vipassana it begins with a single breath. That solitary breath is the very essence of this ancient meditation technique that was handed down over the past 25 centuries by the Buddha himself as a means of finding enlightenment. What exactly is enlightenment? It can mean many things to different people but in my personal journey it meant finding inner peace. That we are all interconnected to each other as well as nature in simple yet profound ways. That to find that inner peace and that connection is to know one's self. That to be truly happy, it is important to live in the moment without dwelling in the past or worrying about the future. Why? Because everything we do and experience in life is so temporary - nothing good nor nothing bad lasts forever.

Of course that is what the course meant to me, what it means to anyone else may be a different variation of that but the principle remains basically the same. Now you may be thinking that the above are very obvious truths and may readily accept them by reading over them at an intellectual level. So why go to Vipassana then? Why spend ten days away from your life, loved ones, job - pretty much your entire way of life as you know it? Why give up your cell phone, computer, tv, reading, writing, talking or even glancing at another human being just to understand something so simple? Because to truly understand something, it can't be just done at a surface (or intellectual) level but at the experiential level. For example I could give you a 1000 books on India and have 1000 people tell you about it as well - but neither of those could compare to spending one day walking the streets there yourself. You could do all the research in the world on raising a child but the only way to truly understand it is by helping to raise one yourself. Even something as simple as how an orange would taste - could you really do it justice by explaining to someone what that is like? Or would it make much more sense (and be much simpler) to just give a person one and let them taste it for themselves?



This in essence is what Vipassana is - to understand how to be happier and more satisfied with life at that experiential level instead of just at the surface. But something so noble and amazing does not come at a small price. You have to work (albeit quietly) and work hard at that. Giving exactly half of a 24 hour day to meditating is not exactly fun and not really a vacation. But if you think about it - anything truly worth it in life is never going to be easy. For me personally, each day (some more arduous than others) was all worth it for the one hour video discourse by the main teacher of Vipassana, Mr. S.N. Goenka. A wise, sweet and often funny man - his talks made everything really come together. For example, the first day your mind is racing in a hundred different directions, despite all the cushions every joint is aching and you feel like running away - and during the first evening's discourse Goenkaji acknowledges that and explains why you went through it and that it will get better. For those of you familiar with the movie 'The Karate Kid', Vipassana was a similar experience. But instead of learning karate one gets to know ones self better and how the "wax on, wax off" of your day unlocked yet another secret to this technique of self discovery.

Since this is a Buddhist technique and actually the very technique that the Buddha himself used in it's purest form one may be wondering - was it a religious or cult thing? Actually it was quite the opposite. No matter what religion or faith you believe or even if you are an atheist - I truly believe it will you help find peace and tranquility in your life. I would even go as far to say that I can't think of one single person in my life that wouldn't benefit in some way from taking this course. Buddhism (as I understand it) is not really pro religion or anti religion but it's more like the yoga of religions. What do I mean? I mean that yoga on it's own is very helpful on a physical (and mental) level but doing it will help any other physical activity you do (i.e. tennis, golf, running, etc.) In that same respect Vipassana can be immensely helpful on it's own accord or integrated seamlessly with your own personal beliefs.



In my personal as well as professional life I have conducted as well as participated in many 'self help' programs (some costing thousands of dollars) and in my opinion not one of them compares to how much this FREE course will teach you. That's because it deals with universal truths, doesn't deal in worksheets or break out groups and never gets you to try and 'buy into' in any kind of method or system. It helps you understand two things better - the law of nature and who you are within. This is not to say that it's for everyone. You should be in a relatively good place in your life and not be coming to this to escape any major life stressors like a loss or a break up. That being said, this course doesn't involve any grand, esoteric philosophical ideas. It's beauty lies in it's simplicity and it's simplicity is what makes it so universal and applicable to everyone.

And I mean universal in the truest sense of the word - everything from the moment you step on the grounds is free of charge and has been paid for by donations from past participants who have completed the course and felt they got something beneficial out of it who now wanted to 'pay it forward'. The only cost to you is the transportation to and from the center. Any donation that you want to give (based on what you got out of it and your means) on the last day is accepted without any pressure and completely voluntary. There are no locks on any of the doors and you are free to leave at anytime if you feel the course was too intense for you (the first three days were the hardest for me). In short, the whole place is run on the honor system and you get out of it whatever you yourself put into it.

The setting for all the centers worldwide are pretty much the same - near a major city to make it accessible but far enough away to minimize the noise and maximize the tranquility. In fact, the center I went to (near Dallas) was downright idyllic like a scene of out of the movie 'Legend'. Resplendent with wide open spaces, wildflowers growing everywhere on the walking trails, butterflies, fireflies, birds of every kind and rabbits that had lost their fear of people. This was all done with the purpose to give one a peaceful place to reflect during the breaks.



In regards to the accommodations - they were both simple yet comfortable. Each person gets his or her own room equipped with a bed, some shelves and a window. The women all had private bathrooms and the men had semi private ones and it was all kept impeccably clean by old students on a daily basis. The temperature was always well maintained but extra blankets were there for those that needed them. The group meditation hall was a very calming place that contained a variety of cushions and chairs along with ambient lighting to make the experience as comfortable and serene as possible.

Also, I would be remiss if I didn't talk about the food that was served. In a word it was delicious. The servers (again, old students who had come back to volunteer) cooked up simple yet wonderfully fresh and tasty vegetarian meals in a buffet style setting. Water, tea and coffee were available all day long and fruit with ginger tea was served nightly in lieu of dinner (you don't really miss the evening meal as much as you think you would and I never went hungry). A teacher and manager (one each respectively for the men and women) were always available to answer any questions about the accommodations or the course itself. I never really needed either because the elegant words of Goenka were enough for me - it is what it is.



Final Thoughts The first thing I hear when I tell someone about this course is "that sounds awesome but there is NO way I could go that long with talking/seeing my loved ones/reading" etc. I tell them that there were many things in life I am sure you thought you couldn't do but that if you want to - you can do anything if you really want to do it. If you don't end up liking the course it, no real harm done and if you liked it you can apply it to your life to make it better. And if you really enjoyed it you can continue your meditation practice at home, do a 3 day refresher course, another 10 day course and for the truly ambitious folks you can do a 30 and 45 day course as well. Will I? Probably not. I got enough of what I expected to get out of this in my 10 day jaunt and am good with it. Has this experience changed me? Well, if you mean am I going to shave my head, don an orange robe and join a monastery then no, not to that extent.

I saw Vipassana more as a vitamin for the soul - it is good for you but not necessarily in a tangible way that you will be able to feel. I will still be the same 'me' at the core - enjoying time with my family & friends, keeping up my same general routine, cheering on my beloved Longhorns and I certainly don't plan on giving up bacon anytime soon ;) But I will see the world a little differently now, enjoying things as they come instead of wishing they would be different, react less harshly to things I don't like and most importantly - live in the moment with the knowledge that nothing we experience (either good or bad) is permanent.



A few months ago when our baby boy Rajan was beginning to crawl, the only question people would ask me is "has he started walking yet"? I remember thinking that he will be walking relatively soon and will do so for the rest of his life - why can't I just enjoy the few magical months when he is crawling? Why the rush? And then it hit me - that I now understand what magic really is. Magic is a baby crawling and going to sleep in your arms, it's that one fantastic night out with your friends that you still talk about to this day or when your favorite team scores that goal to win the big game. Magic is in the moment and because that moment is so impermanent is what makes it so amazing. And now I understand why the Buddha smiles...

(For more info on Vipassana and attending a course click here)

My favorite Amitabh movies

AMITABH MOVIES

1. Anand – One of his first films that had Rajesh Khanna in the starring role (in one of his best performances). Remade into ‘Kal ho na ho’.
2. Guddi – a flop when released but a fine film. His first with Jaya.
3. Roti,Kapada aur Makan – a multi-starrer about societal problems.
4. Mili – another one with Jaya – great performance in a dark role.
5. Deewaar – one of my all time faves. To this day, the only (and first) Indian movie to show smoking in bed after sex.
6. Sholay – my all time fave, what else can I say?
7. Don – the all-time over the top 70’s Amitabh movie.
8. Muqaddar ka Sikander – features one of the most famous Amitabh/Rekha songs of all time.
9. The Great Gambler – another over the top 70’s flick. Shot in various locations all over the world – almost too much 
10. Kaala Patthar – about coal miners, a surprisingly good multi-starrer.
11. Suhaag – great pairings – great songs – great buddy pic.
12. Do Aur Do Paanch – the funniest Amitabh movie ever.
13. Naseeb – great multi-starrer from director of Amar, Akbar, Anthony
14. Laawaris – fantastic flick.
15. Faraar – a very little known Amitabh/Sharmila Tagore starrer. Takes place over one night – a very different movie.
16. Silsila – great movie & now legendary for the telling of the Amitabh/Rekha love affair on screen.
17. Yaarana – another great comedy with wonderful songs.
18. Satte pe Satta – 7 brides for 7 brothers Indian style.
19. Namak Halal – one of his few movies with Smita Patil.
20. Shakti – only movie with the legend, Dilip Kumar. A classic.
21. Andhaa Kanoon – a surprisingly thoughtful movie.
22. Collie – the movie in which he suffered his life-threatening injury. Brought India to a halt in 1983.
23. Sharaabi – an Amitabh-in-every-scene blockbuster.
24. Khuda Gawah – the last great Amitabh movie before his modern day resurgence.
25. Veer Zaara – my favorite ‘new’ Amitabh movie and one of my favorite Indian movies of all time. Anytime you can get a sympathetic performance of a Pakistani character it’s a triumph.

My favorite random Bollywood movies

OTHER FAVORITE INDIAN MOVIES

I tried to pick some of the ‘best of the best’ from the classics – not necessarily blockbuster hits but important landmarks in Indian cinema.

1. Amar Prem – the best of the Rajesh Khanna/Sharmila Tagore starrers from the 60’s. Great acting & great songs.
2. Aandhi – originally banned because it mirrored the life of Indhira Gandhi a little too closely. Arguably with 3 of the best Lata/Kishore duets ever.
3. Pakeezah – one of the greatest love stories ever told on & off the screen. Kamaal Amrohi (director & producer) spent his life’s savings on this movie (in production for 14 years). His wife (the legendary Meena Kumari) went into a deep depression during filming and drank herself to death before it’s release. Absolutely amazing period piece.
4. Chalti ka naam gaadi – B/W. The 3 brothers Kumar along with Kishore’s future wife (Madhubala) in a very sweet movie with great songs.
5. Andaz – B/W. The only movie ever made starring Raj Kapoor, Dilip Kumar & Nargis – another all time classic (and another one where the on-screen story was based on the off-screen truth).
6. Mughal-E-Azam – the ‘Citizen Kane’ of Indian Cinema. Recently re-released in India & Pakistan (the 1st Indian movie released there in 41 years). Absolutely amazing Urdu dialogues & the real life love story between Dilip Kumar & Madhubala on/off screen.
7. Arth – Smita Patil & Shabana Azmi owned this movie – the sparks flew between the 2 actresses in real life and it showed.
8. Aakrosh – based on a true story and made Om Puri a star. I couldn’t move for 10 minutes after this movie ended – powerful.
9. Garam Hawa – made in 1975 and originally banned (but later won the National Award) for being the first movie to ever address the painful topic of Partition.
10. Hifaazat (In Custody) – stars Shashi Kapoor as a famous alcoholic Urdu poet in the twilight of his life. A Merchant/Ivory production.
11. Hey Ram – Indian audiences rejected this Kamal Hassan movie about the ideologies of Gandhi and it’s effects on the common man during the pre-Independence days.
12. Mother India – the 1st Indian movie to be nominated for an Oscar – what a performance by Nargis.
13. Devdas (B/W) the movie that made Dilip Kumar a star. The original and the best.
14. Guide – considered Dev Anand’s finest film.
15. Masoom – good movie with the cutest child stars ever (the oldest daughter is none other than Urmila).
16. Padosan – Kishore Kumar’s finest acting hour – a wonderful comedy that is still fresh today.
17. Gol Maal – a great comedy from the 80’s.
18. Mahal (B/W) – an Ashok Kumar/Madhubala (in her first movie) that was way ahead of it’s time. Contains Lata’s first hit song…
19. Achut Kanya (The untouchable girl) (B/W) – starring Devika Rani (India’s first female superstar) this movie from the 30’s tells the story of an untouchable girl and Brahmin boy. Dying to see this one but can’t find it – movies back then took some great chances.
20. Shatranj Ki Khiladi – Satyajit Ray’s first foray into Hindi Cinema (did all his films in Bengali). Limited release due to his ‘arthouse’ reputation but a solid piece of film-making.
21. Chori Chori (B/W) – Raj Kapoor’s ode to old Hollywood (remake of ‘It happened one night’) – one of his biggest hits with his favorite on screen heroine, Nargis.
22. Pyaasa (B/W) - considered Guru Dutt’s masterpiece – a magical film done by one of the true visionaries in Indian cinema.
23. Chakra – another great parallel cinema movie with Smita Patil.
24. Dor – my FAVORITE Bollywood movie of the last 5 years.
25. Iqbal – the cricket version of ‘Lagaan’ – same director as Dor.
26. Chotisi Baat – sweet movie from the 70’s – just lovely.
27. Chashme Buddhor – see #26 but shows life as a college student too.
28. Raja Hindustani – one of my 2 favorite early Aamir Khan movies.
29. Rangeela – my other favorite Aamir movie starring Urmila as well.
30. Socha Na Tha - little seen but great recent movie.
31. Guru - Abhishek & Ash's best film together.
32. Omkara - Saif's, Ajay Devgan & Kareena's finest moments in the retelling of Othello.
33. Chameli - Just when you thought Kareena couldn't act, this movie that takes place over one night convinces you otherwise. Sajna Veh Sajna is an amazing song as well.